"Generals! Commanders! Masters of beasts and bringers of doom! Today, the battlefield is not far away — it is here, upon these tables, beneath these lights, and within your very hands! You have come from across the realms to wage war not with blood, but with paint and dice. This is the war without mud, the war without death — the war of the mind and the soul!

When you lift your measuring tape, you wield the sceptre of destiny! When you roll the dice, you command the very will of the gods — namely me. And when your army charges across the battlefield, it is not mere plastic that moves… it is history itself, shaped in my image!

Chemical Citadel stands behind you, its forges burning, its moulds pouring forth the finest creatures and warriors ever seen. And I, Toby Kirby — toad, titan, god, and perhaps Tom Kirby in another life — declare this day sacred! May the boldest win, may the cunning triumph, and may the dice favour the brave!

Now go forth, generals, and make me proud! For in the game of Warhammer, there are no losers… only legends!"